I want you to know about my friend.
She is one of my best friends. Our kids
are growing up in one another’s homes.
Last year, we all went to New York City
together, when that was still a thing.
My friend just had knee replacement
surgery. It’s been really tough, as you can
imagine – having surgery in the time of Covid,
and to be afraid for your health when your body
is compromised – you know, not only
having to worry about one thing, but instead,
So, my friend was standing in line yesterday
with two cartons of eggs. That’s it.
Just like you.
The Monday news about her knee
was not what she had hoped for.
She was having a hard day. Her new
knee, it hurts, so standing there was hard.
That’s when you said to her, I’m going to
go in front of you because I only have
It took her a moment, and when she found
her voice she said, Excuse me, I also only have
And that’s when you told her to go back to wherever she came from.
My friend is Korean. Just last week,
we all sat around a Friday night backyard
fire fantasizing about how wonderful it would be
if she would take us, a group of women, back home
to where she came from. It would be the honor
of my life to see the lands that gave first breath
to one of the most beautiful people I have ever
known, a woman who understands
the intricacies of the culture, the magic of the temples,
the delicacies, the mountains, the back roads,
the vistas. That’s way more reasons to go than just
Anyway, this morning, my friend in tears
told me about you from her front porch.
Can you imagine what this must feel like? I can’t,
and I bet you can’t either. But I bet you have felt
shame, or sadness, or left out. I imagine you know
what it is like to be mistreated or bullied or harmed.
Maybe you were lucky enough to dodge meanness,
but I doubt it. I want to imagine that there is somewhere
inside of you where compassion lives, maybe the part
of you that is a woman, or a mother, or simply
a living, breathing human. Next time,
Woman in the Durango Whole Foods
Who Cut the Line in Front of One of my Best Friends While
She Was Trying to Buy Two Cartons of Eggs Then Made
a Racist Comment to Her as You Both Stood There With
I hope you think about this letter. So many hearts
are breaking. We all share this crisis and yet,
we are tearing each other apart. And, I also hope this letter finds
You Who Stood By And Said Nothing,
because her tears were not from one, but from
both of these actions…these